Being an over-thinker is like a double-edged sword while thinking things through certainly does help in the process of decision-making and does not leave the concerned individual with much space to make mistakes, the process in which over-thinkers get work done might be considered to be slow or delayed compared to others. Excessive thinking also does not help where instant decisions have to be taken.
I am in love with an overthinker
Relationships are hard to maintain, they take a lot of effort and time. If you are in a relationship with an overthinker, the relationship can be even harder. So how do you maintain the relationship in such a scenario? If your partner is someone who gets constantly stressed and anxious owing to their overthinking nature, you have to be kind and considerate towards them. Treat them with compassion, don’t say things that you don’t mean in a reckless fashion. Be loving and understanding of your partner. If you are in love with someone who is an overthinker,
Here are 6 things you need to know:
1. Never tell your partner
“it’s fine, you are overreacting”: Here, not only you are undermining the feelings that have been evoked in them owing to any stressful situation, also you are making it seem like you are completely oblivious to their emotions. It is indeed a pointless act to tell someone to stop overreacting or overanalyzing a situation, chances are, they will indulge in the same action of overthinking even more if you do so.
2. Don’t judge an over-thinker
If even for a moment, if you make a person who is inclined to overthink, to believe that you are judging them in any manner whatsoever for who they are, they will start overthinking about it even more. This undoubtedly will cause more harm than good. Ensure that they feel secure and comfortable enough with you to share their feelings. This will increase feelings of trust and understanding in the couple. Lend an ear, a helping hand and a supportive shoulder whenever they need you to.
3. Be reassuring and confident enough when it comes to your relationship
The worst thing you can do when it comes to your relationship with a partner who is an overthinker is to not be confident enough and always make them feel like you are on the verge of breaking the relationship off. This not only amplifies helplessness and feelings of insecurity, but it can also cause a lot of anxiety in the partner who is an overthinker. Be the reassuring one when it comes to your relationship with them.
4. Don’t push them:
In most cases, an overthinker takes more time than an average person when it comes to making a decision or coming to a stance, be it their family, workplace, or relationship. Forcing them for commitment, or taking any early decision when it comes to your relationship. Let them take their time, let things flow naturally and things develop organically in due course of time.
5. Plan things ahead:
Overthinkers usually don’t prefer surprises. They generally like to be more in control of a situation, and the best way to do this is to let them know about your ideas and the things that you have kept planned for the materialization of your ideas. This way, they will get more time to process the same. The spontaneity of a surprise is something that might seem appealing, but it’s best that you keep in mind your partner’s needs and nature as well.
6. Show that you care, accept them for who they are:
Pay attention to the minute little details in your relationship, and they will love you for that. Be there when they need you, show that you care. Most importantly, acknowledge the vital fact that they are not responsible, neither to blame for their overthinking nature. Accept them as they are. After all, no one is perfect, no one is free of flaws. If they have accepted you for who you are, you must reciprocate and do the same.
What should you not say to an Overthinker?
Really? Do you think that never occurred to an overthinker? It’s the most stupid thing you can say to them And that will be the opposite of calming an overthinker down.
“You should take it easy. Let it go.”
Trust me, They try hard to take things easy.
“It’s not a big deal.”
Believe me, every little thing is a big deal for an overthinker. They create hour-long movies in their head about that one text or that one incident.
Don’t say ever this if you don’t mean it. Don’t say this if you’re not actually willing to listen to them Don’t say this word if you’re going to interrupt them by pointing out how irrational they are. Don’t say this unless you intend to stay. And listen.
Relationships are worth the effort and time if the person is right for you. A relationship with an overthinker might seem like a lot of work, but a person’s overthinking nature has certain advantages as well. They can actually help you in taking the right decisions when it comes to tricky situations. They can make the most considerate and compassionate partners when you go through your emotional turmoils, simply because they have been there. Have boundless love and respect for each other, and the rest will follow.